Breaking up with someone is not easy. This is especially the case of break-ups that do not occur because of a serious reason, like one of the parts cheating on the other. You’ve probably realized you don’t love your partner anymore, but that doesn’t mean you want to hurt them. Believe it or not, there are ways of letting someone go easily. The dumpee will probably still end up sad, but not as bummed out if you do it right. Check out these tips for breaking up with your partner in a gentle way.
THE HONEST TRUTH
Be upfront about the reason why you’ve decided to end it. You’ve spent some time with that person and must care about them; be mature and explain your reasons, it might actually help them improve something for future relationships.
It might seem obvious, but not all people dump in person. It is harsh enough that you’re leaving your partner, don’t you think they deserve the respect for you to show up? Don’t just text. Really.
IT’S NOT YOU, IT’S CLICHé
Stay away from made-up phrases like “you deserve better than me”, “I love you but I’m not in love with you”, and the old-time classic “it’s not you, it’s me.” Even if those are true, they are so used up that they lose their real value. Go for something that applies to your situation.
Each relationship is different, as each break up should be. If you’ve been dating for 6 months, the break up will come in easier than if you’ve been living together for 3 years. Take the appropriate actions for each particular case.
Tell your partner exactly when and where your relationship started changing to you. Was it when he went through your mail? Was it when she started paying more attention to her job? They deserve to know.
THREE IS A CROWD
Don’t talk about other people, even though you are ending it because of someone else. If you have a new crush, don’t mention it as the cause of your break up. You’re breaking up because something is missing, so focus on that.
UNFRIENDING HIM FRIENDLY
When you’re the dumper, it sucks if you block or unfriend the dumpee. The latter actually gets that “honor”—yes, that’s the unwritten rule of social media. Give them some time before shutting them off completely.
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES
Still on the social media topic, try to hold on before posting about your fun, single new life. It’s hard for them to be dumped, imagine how hard it will be to see you winning the night.
STAY IN TOUCH
You’ve shared so much with this person and now they have to stop receiving your texts and trusting you their things. Help them make this transition easier, and stay in touch with a few messages asking how things are going. When the time is right, they will no longer depend on that.
WHAT THE FUTURE BRINGS
Break ups can make you feel hopeless, so try to make the dumpee feel this is not the end of love. Highlight this might hurt a bit now, but it means a new opportunity to find someone that’s better suited for them. Giving them a little hope for future relationships will help.